Sighing

Has it really been 4 months since I last updated this blog? I don't like to shame myself into doing something, but this really is shameful. The disappointing thing is that I have mentally written posts many times, only to be deterred by things to do, the time it would take to upload a picture, or overall exhaustion. I guess it makes sense that about the last time I posted, we got pregnant. 

Pregnancy round 2 has been very different. At first I was sick,... until about week 7. Then I was extremely sick. With Caleb I threw up morning and night and then just mornings until Week 24. This time I was nauseous all day and sick in the morning. It really made for some uncomfortable moments, hours, days. I was also very tired. 

In August we found out we were having twins. Well that makes sense! Granted I've heard every pregnancy was different, but the intensity of my heartburn, nausea, and fatigue seemed ridiculous. At the very beginning of September I had a doctor's appointment and opted this time for the anti-nausea meds. Josh asked me to consider it this time, and I really couldn't say no. I didn't know how I could be a teacher, mother, wife, and family organizer while feeling this way. Thank goodness the meds really worked. I wasn't cured by any means, but I felt much more human...until the side effects of the meds really made me reconsider taking them. I was struggling with more intense heartburn and constipation. Yuck! So around MEA (3rd week of October) I weaned myself off while having a long weekend off work. I still can get nauseous, but overall I have my body in check and can function better. 

Caleb knows things are changing, but he's not quite sure what. He will point at my belly when prompted and say "babies." But overall he's still in the dark. My belly is measuring about 6 weeks ahead of schedule, which is typical for twins. I have practically stopped picking up Caleb from the ground. He's 40 lbs and it's just too much pressure at this time. I also have a supportive and willing husband who has stepped up doing the laundry and vacuuming since those chores are too much weight to lug around .

Caleb updates: He was ghost for Halloween. I sewed his costume out of a King Size pillowcase. He loves to say "ohooo oooo" and "Boo!" Just today he wanted to wear his costume again. 

October 31st was also his last night with his nuk. There's been a little more heartache at bedtime, but we're in process of it taking less than 10 minutes to lay him down and sit by his door. He doesn't leave his bed at least. He just needs some extra security again now that the Nuk is gone. 

Caleb is an expressive communicator, but not yet clear. We're working on saying the beginning and endings of our words. He's coming slowly along. Every once in awhile he really has a story or a play idea, but out of context Josh and I look at each other and say, "We've got nothing." As now he doesn't get too upset, but we're working on it so he doesn't get too frustrated. 

Caleb baptized me with his first night time puke. Our pajamas and sheets got changed and he slept with Daddy in the living room. Josh opted to stay home as I had conferences. Apparently the middle of the night episode took care of it though. He was up and his happy self the next day. Glad he kicked its butt!

This Thanksgiving we celebrated at my Mom's with the Harjes extended family. We were 13 adults and Caleb. Lots of good food and laughter. I was just recovering from the flu, but feeling myself again. The only thing was my stamina really still wanted me to just sit around. Luckily Thanksgiving isn't too active of a holiday, just my son is. Again, Josh steps up and he really helped out!

Today we are getting some cleaning and organizing done. Saturday is football, Ohio State and Michigan, and Josh's nephew is playing basketball in town. Sunday we will begin decorating for the holidays. I can't wait. I need to spruce some things up. 

The title of this post is not "Catching My Breath" because I don't feel like I'm resting or caught up, but rather I am taking a sigh. Trying to take a moment to breathe in and out with ease. Breathing will start getting harder as these babies take up more and more room, so I need to make the most of deep sighs I have left. 

Because it is November most people list their blessings, but last spring I started doing that due to a book "1000 Gifts" I read by Ann Voskamp. It has become a discipline to stop, pause, and recognize the blessings around me. And so it is with a very generic sigh of gratefulness that I end this post today. 

Until next time,
may you find a moment to sigh in and out with peace.
Bri